


mario vs sonic

by theleeryone



Category: Sonic the Hedgehog - All Media Types, Super Mario & Related Fandoms
Genre: Other
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-25
Updated: 2017-03-25
Packaged: 2018-10-10 09:33:52
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,656
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10434783
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/theleeryone/pseuds/theleeryone
Summary: what wiuld happen if mario and Sonic fought





	

“You’re too slow!” Sonic shouted as Mario’s jaw unhinged, his lips wrapping around Sonic, swallowing that magnanimous being from the legs up. “I do not wish to make myself a laughing-stock before these idle listeners.

“…I wish I could write as mysterious as a cat.” A cat like Big the Cat, perchance, who stood by and watched with dawning horror as Mario’s gaping maw snaked upward. Sonic looked into Big’s eyes and said to him, slowly, “Procrastination is the thief of time. Collar him.”

But Big unquestionably could do nothing but stare, motionless, rooted to the ground with fright… A good writer possesses not only his spirit but the spirit of his friends. Big reminded himself of this, and in his journal chronicled the chaotic scene before him. For the sake of science, and for the advancement of mankind, he instinctually knew that he must document this, aware that it would mean the death of Sonic, as well as Big himself. “Let not sloth dim your horrors new begot,” Sonic said unto him, his flesh turning an altogether more unsettling shade of blue as the plumber constricted around his throat.

Meagerly attempt as he might, the cat could not will himself to lift his feet from their perch. Sonic's eyes swelled under the pressure as his head was slowly crushed by the weight of Mario's jaws. He reached out to Big with a single gloved hand as Mario's mouth encompassed his entire body, the impression of Sonic's body visible underneath his rubbery, formless flesh. It writhed with what Big could only assume to be pain for a moment and then, succumbing to the inescapable draw of death, halted. Sonic's outstretch arm fell limp, hanging from Mario's lips. 

Like a noodle, he slurped it into his estuary of opinion until it was no more. Mario looked to the broad welkin and with a silent scream unleashed a cloud of ash. His head rotated, slowly, body unsettlingly still, until his gaze fell upon Big.

"It's-a me, Mario," came the voice from his motionless lips, a voice both belonging to him and entirely alien. Big heard it in the air around him, he heard it from within, he heard it coming forth from the bones of the earth, and he trembled.

“I do not wish to make myself a laughing-stock before these idle listeners.” Sonic’s words echoed in Big’s mind, and he became suddenly, acutely aware of the listening ears and watchful eyes permeating the space around him. Invisible to the eye and yet impossible to unsee… silent, but deafening.

Mario leapt into the air, a blinding, furious blur, and landed atop Big's head. The cat suddenly, violently plunged to the earth below him, his mind struggling to uphold itself even as his body collapsed, imploding inward into two-dimensions. And before him was an incomprehensible giant, a mass of unseeable shapes, a being of such concepts as volume and mass, concepts which could no longer exist.

And Big screamed. A swaggering scoundrel, he screamed a soundless scream into infinity, as his body instantly, and yet impossibly slowly, became nothing. Where once there was the Cat, was presently an emptiness, imperceptible to anything but itself.

And Mario smiled, an unnatural smile, his lips turning up in a terrifying grin, so foreign and yet so familiar, that any who saw it would know that whatever created this smile had never experienced humanity. "Ya-hoo!" he assuredly declared, and jumped again into the air, fist raised high above his head, in celebration of his conquest. And He-Who-Consumed was glad.

 

The crushing weight of Sonic's absence left an impact on the holy globe. The red echidna, tireless in his quest to protect that sacred stone, felt deep within his bones the sudden painful absence of the blue hedgehog.

And the emerald spake unto him and told him of a thousand horrors, of an army of unspeakable, unknowable terrors, of the inevitable, unstoppable tide of death and despair that lay ahead. It hushedly told him of the Plumber, He-Who-Consumed, the Ageless One. And the perennial celestial tears fell upon his cheeks, as Knuckles realized there was nothing left for him or, indeed, anyone in this world. The horizon of the infinite was bleak - the end approached. 

Behind him, he heard the snapping of a twig, and he knew he could not resist. And so, without a word, he fell backward into the blackness of the abyss, and embraced nothingness.

And Mario laughed. "Hoo-hoo!" he cried with miserable glee, as the shimmering gem before that dastardly vagabond shattered and reformed, shattered and reformed, a thousand times over, in a fruitless attempt to escape the approach of oblivion. Mario touched it with single finger, and in an instant it was gone, and in its place was a single rusted coin. And Mario's eyes grew dark, and with a terrible shriek he bellowed, "Here we go!"

 

As the shining eye of heaven grew dark over the horizon for the third time, blinking for a moment and covering the globe with shadow, the resistance, such as it was, wept. The Chaos Emeralds, assembled, were inert.

Amy Rose fell to her knees, weeping. Their efforts distinctly had been in vain - had they known sooner, could catastrophe have been avoided? Could the oncoming approach of emptiness have been prevented? Was there anything they could have done, with more time? Or were their efforts doomed to fail from the very start?

And as she wept, she felt a familiar touch against her skin... and the frog stared up at her. "Ribbit," Froggy whispered.

It echoed within her, and she understood. It was a booming cry of support, and it echoed within her, shaking apart her very being.

"Ribbit," Froggy said again, nearly silent yet impossibly loud. And before her she saw, outstretched, the plains of infinity. The horizon, endless, stretched for a million million miles, as mountains impossibly high and seas impossibly wide were birthed from the cradle of Eternity. And she beheld the Angels, Terrible and Great, shrieking, writhing masses of flesh and blood and steel and fire, with lidless eyes and flapping wings, weapons of imperceivable might. held in their hands. And it was both comforting and terrifying.

And then the vision faded away, and she saw again the crushingly finite reality. Froggy lay on the ground, weak from the effort, and viciously screamed again in his final breath: "Ribbit." And the earth kindly opened beneath them, and they graciously entered its welcoming embrace.

And from the pit crept forth Luigi, and he stared down at the city of lights, and he knew that his time has come. It unquestionably would be decided, here and now, and nothing could stop what was to come. It echoed within her, and she understood. It was a booming cry of support, and it echoed within her, shaking apart her very being.

And he came down into the city, in search of his brother and foe. And he saw terror and chaos. The streets ran red with the vital essences of the earth and its peoples. The blood feast had come, and it was all he could take to continue forward. This was his destiny. His mortal journey, and those of countless others, had been building up to this one moment in time, the zenith of history itself.

However, he could not see his enemy. Merely empty thoroughfares and broken homes, and he was confused. And as he progressed, a swelling sense of dread rose within him. And 

he meagerly attempted to quell it, but for naught.

And then, suddenly, he saw it, and was afraid.

A foot, and another, each the size of a house, and stretching upward, cascading denim jeans worn over legs of inconceivable width. Mario towered before him, and he trembled. And in a moment, it was all over.

Luigi was held between Mario's fingers, not daring to resist the End, as Mario held him before his eyes. And then his mouth opened again, and Luigi saw Hell itself, and saw worse.

Within that black pit he saw a thousand faces, all his own, and within their mouths he saw a thousand more, each with a thousand eyes and a thousand ears. And they observed him, judging him for his failures. And then, in a deafening chorus, they cried out for help. "Lots of spaghetti," they sobbed. "Lot's of spaghetti." And Luigi knew he had failed, and he knew that this was the End.

And the nothingness took him.

Mario screamed, his voice like ten thousand nails on ten thousand chalkboards, and he Consumed. The countless billions, he swallowed whole. The earth itself, he took into his belly. And still, he was not satisfied, and his appetite continued. The celestial spheres, the galaxy itself, everything fed into his endless Hunger.

Time and Space, Life and Death, Being and Nonbeing - these were as nothing to him, and he consumed them all. Eternity was o'er in an instant. Existence itself succumbed to him. And yet that still was not enough. And, having eaten creation, he found himself outside of it, the heavens outstretched eternally before him. And an army of infinity angels swarmed before him, and were batted away like so many flies. And still he fed, and the very fires of the gods were extinguished.

And Yet He Hungered.

And with Creation itself consumed, he ate outwards, swallowing the nothingness ahead, until he saw the light of the Multiverse. Infinite realities, infinite collections of infinite realities; a thousand million multiverses, and more - and these he devoured. And in the end, he was still hungry. But there was nothing left - and not even that, for in his crazed fervor he had consumed even the Nothingness between the gaps.

And so he did all he knew to do – all he could do – and he began to consume himself. He swallowed himself whole. And again, and again, until there was only emptiness, and less.

**Author's Note:**

> This piece was written using a demo from google that inserted snippets from a variety of famous dead authors. I tried to keep most of those, and build off of them, but that was difficult sometimes. For example, Edgar Allen Poe kept correcting "Big" to "Voluminous." By the end I mostly just ignored it.
> 
> If you see anything that doesn't really read well, or feels like it was the result of somebody flipping through a thesaurus it's probably the result of that. It was kind of awkward at times.


End file.
